There are many perks to working for 您rself in 您r twenties such as the freedom, both literally and creatively, the pride of creating a world for 您rself and of course, in my case doing something I completely and utterly love.
Discussing the downside to being 您r own boss and running 您r own businesses in 您r twenties is something I’ve wanted to chat about for a while. It’s a tricky subject to tackle as I am so grateful and so proud to have created this job for myself and I truly, truly love what I do. However, I think it’s important to show the downsides to life; the things 那 make us all human and I guess the things 那 go unspoken in this world of social media.
我经常担心这些类型的帖子，因为现在很容易冒犯别人，即使只是谈论方式 I feel. I’m sure some negative Nelly will leave this blogpost having only taken away the fact 那 他们 觉得我是“忘恩负义“ 要么 ”吟”，但他们 不 我正在和他们聊天的人，他们从未去过，他们 决不 将会。
The people I’m talking to in this blogpost are those 那 have supported me from the beginning, or even those 那 have only just started supporting me, but who have been there for me through the ups and the downs. I am very much a normal 26 year old Northern gal, who just so happens to be on social media and just so happens to work for herself. It’s taken a lot of hard work to get 这里 and more recently a little knock to my mental health so I think it’s important to share this with 您 and to also act as a little bit of therapy for me too, ‘cause we all know how good it feels to talk! If 您’re feeling at all down, lost or completely messed up, please know 您’re 不 alone. Talk to somebody whether it’s me (my emails and DM’s are always open) or even better a close friend or family member. A problem shared is a problem halved after all!
So, six and a half years and a heck load of work, into this rather strange yet totally wonderful career online and just when I thought I had the whole thing sussed, something shifted and I began to spiral out of control a wee bit. Now I’m 不 being dramatic 这里 but I really did change a little. Something inside my head altered and I was no longer the positive, proactive and driven person 那 I had always been. I began to doubt everything I wrote and shared, I doubted what I was wearing and I had a panic attack in the middle of a busy dance floor…
That was one of the scariest moments of my life and I actually can’t believe I’m writing this 这里. My mum’s 不 going to be happy with me for sharing this one, but if it helps just one of 您 then I’ll be glad I did share after all.
After my major blip on the dance floor I raced to my parents house at midnight and cried my eyes out for no reason whatsoever. I proclaimed 那 I’d lost myself, I didn’t want to do this anymore and 那 I wanted to hide away from the judgemental eyes of viewers and followers.
您 see, when 您 read nasty and fabricated things about 您rself online, despite how many or how few there may be, 您 start to believe them. 您 start to think 那 everyone else thinks 那, and 您 inevitably lose 您rself to the negativity.
Until this moment back in January I’d been able to brush off the negativity (after having a sulk about it for a day or two) but it was the moment I felt 那 I didn’t know what to wear in a morning 那 I knew 那 I’d lost myself well and truly. Styling myself was always something I was so confident in, even when everything else seemed so uncertain. I knew who I was style wise and I used clothing as an armour against the world or as a persona I wanted to create 那 day- the minute 那 faltered I knew it was bad.
After a period ov moping in my own self pity, I decided to take ownership of myself again. I sorted out my wardrobe, I added a new piece or two 那 really sparked joy within me and I brainstormed what it was 那 I was good at and what it was 那 I enjoyed doing.
Doing all of the above and sadly going through the tougher times of being self employed through being online made me realise how important it is to feel inspired in 您r work, no matter how 那 translates in 您r industry, I am a fashion content creator so like it or 不 I need to have some of the newness 那 is out there in order to style, write and inspire 您 guys, I can only hope 那 it allows 您 to make better and more meaningful purchases going forward.
Unfortunately negativity in this way comes part and parcel with a lot of jobs 那 are perhaps a little newer in the grand scheme of things or jobs 那 不 everybody understands. It’s the way we as the individual deal with it 那 makes a difference and from 这里 on out I’m trying to find 那 inner sass in order to turn the other cheek to such bad vibes.
I’ve heard this term a lot lately and it seems 那 sadly a lot of online creators are feeling this way; a telling sign of what negativity online, and I guess just working online entirely, can do to our self worth and our mental health. But it’s 不 just working online, this seems to be happening across a whole host of job roles; I think it’s a rather millennial issue 那 a lot of us are trying to deal with which is really rather sad.
I 决不 really understood the meaning of 冒名顶替综合症 until this year when I felt guilty about something I’ve dreamt about all my life potentially happening. I’m still unable to feel proud or get excited about this prospect and it’s really quite sad. I know deep down 那 this is an incredible achievement but my stupid brain won’t allow me to realise 那 I’ve earnt it. Instead I feel guilty and 不 worthy of such a thing and the thought of actually telling people about said achievement is terrifying to me… Go figure!
I would love to be able to tell 您 exactly how I’ve worked to over come this one but the truth is 那 it's still a work in progress, something I’m trying to deal with and work out through time. I’m sure/I hope when said “令人兴奋的前景” actually happens 那 I’ll be able to enjoy it for what it is but until then imposter syndrome is very much a part of my day-to-day life.
Ahhh 那 age old problem of nailing the work:life ratio. Something I was convinced I had nailed but something I’m realising, with time, comes in waves. Sometimes it’s level, other times it isn’t and 那’s just life. However, it doesn’t stop it becoming a bit of an issue at times.
When I first took my blog into full time territory I had this down to a fine art. I loved being able to take the morning or afternoon off to enjoy the perks of being self employed. And if I wanted to take the day off to enjoy some time with George, friends, family or just for me then I’d do it, safe in the knowledge 那 this was what I’d worked so hard for and 那 I deserved it. I was confident in my routine and confident enough in my work to allow myself to revel in working for myself.
Being able to work for 您rself is a luxury 那 不 everyone has and I know 那 I should enjoy it while it lasts ‘cause it might 不 be the case forever. I’m also learning 那 taking the time away from my work actually helps in the long run, it provides more interesting Instagram的 Stories or vlog footage, it takes me away from a non-starter idea and works to give me the inspiration I need, and it of course does wonders for my happiness.
Learning to switch off is key for all kinds of jobs, there’s no point dwelling on what 您 could be doing, if 您’re 不 feeling it then step away, take a breather and come back to it tomorrow. Work will always (hopefully) be there and in the grand scheme of things, is it really as important as taking 您r Nan out for pizza?
Speaking of work hopefully always being there, it’s a struggle to know where this career in particular is headed. I certainly believe 那 social media will develop and grow and there will always be room for us online, however it’s a scary thought doing this forever, particularly when it comes to self worth and mental health. I think it’s important with any job to have 您r fingers in many pies, similarly to me with my blog and online world, and then of course with my clothing brand Saturday. I also have other things in the background 那 I don’t share online 那 act as creative outlets in case I want to move onto something else entirely. It’s a scary thing 不 knowing what the future holds, particularly with a job 那 didn’t exist past 10 years ago, but I just need to remember 那 no job is certain, the future is scary for everyone no matter what 他们 do and we’re all in this world of uncertainty together.
比较方式 is of course a part of every type of job out there, there is always someone 您 look to who might be doing a little better, working a little faster or succeeding a little louder, but it’s important to 不 allow this to affect us negatively. Don’t let what other people are doing ruin the way 您 see 您rself (easier said than done I know) we’re all doing our thing in our way and in our own time and whilst it’s normal to compare from time to time, as long as it’s utilised in a way to spur 您 on to be better then unfortunately it’s something 那 simply comes with being human.
If I’m feeling less of a human, I try to think of 4 things 那 I am grateful for and as hippy dippy as 那 sounds, it always makes me realise exactly what I’ve got and brings me crashing back to earth with one almighty “GET A GRIP!” Try it, I’m telling 您 it works!
Sometimes working for 您rself isn’t all it’s cracked up to be; Yes of course it’s fabulous at times and I feel so 幸运 to do what I love every single day, but it’s more the things it does to 您r mind and 您r self worth 那 are harder to understand. Not to mention it can often feel quite lonely doing this kind of job, so getting out and away from work is something we must try and do more of.
我听了其中一首 艾玛 Gannon的播客最近与Wah Nails创始人Sharmadean Reid一起, where she discussed how important it was to track 您r own data in order to truly understand 您rself, makes sense right! How are we supposed to know why we are feeling this way if we don’t have a little log on when we last felt it.
I know 那 when I’m down for no apparent reason and of course when my boobs ache, 那 my period is imminent. However, when I’m angry and unmotivated for no reason I can’t understand it and therefore punish myself for feeling this way which does no good for anything, especially 不 for my productivity. So instead I’m 不ing in my calendar when I’m feeling this way, so I can look back on it next time I feel 那 way to see if there is any correlation. Perhaps I had a night out the evening before, maybe I ate too many carbs, didn’t drink enough water, or maybe it’s a certain month of the year 那 brings me down, tracking this kind of data can only be useful in learning to understand who 您 are, what 您 need and how to get it.
It’s been this way for the past three years at least, so next year, rather than revelling in my own misery and lack of worth, I’m going to ensure 那 I have a holiday booked for the end of January in order to stop this cycle from continuing, sounds great ey!
We all have down times, slow times and moments of doubt, it’s totally normal, it’s talking about it and sharing these moments with one another 那 make it better for 您 and for everyone else. We all need to know 那 we’re 不 alone in our thoughts and our feelings so we can help one another through it. So 那s why I’ve written this post today and I hope it helps even just one of 您 to know 那 we’re all the same whether we work for ourselves or 不, and 那 it feels better to talk, or in my case to write.